The Color of Love
by Exes and Ohs. 2
Summary: People take eyesight for granted. Harry Potter did, and now he's stuck. After he defeats Voldemort and loses his friends, and people he loves, how can he cope with his losses? Small slash (DM/HP), short story, may be longer in future.


I don't own Harry or Draco or anyone. *drools* I wish I did.

Language is a bit strong in this one. Oh well, you'll all live, I take it? Slash (Harry/Draco) like all my other stories, right?

-----*-----

"I can do it myself, God dammit!" Harry hissed, blindly reaching out to find the staircase rail.

"You're going the wrong way!" His professor sneered back, guiding Harry in the right direction, "I swear, Potter, you make things extremely difficult!"

"Yeah, yeah." Harry sighed and grabbed the rail, "when is Remus coming home?"

"Hell if I know."

"You should know. You see him right before you come to get me!" Harry snapped, taking a step up, his walking stick in his other hand, helping him.

"I didn't see him this morning." The man sighed, then grew silent as he kept his hand on Harry's back, helping him up to the top ever so slowly.

Harry caught the tone in his voice and stopped on the stair he was on, "he's visiting Sirius's grave, isn't he?"

"I don't kn -"

"DAMMIT, SEVERUS!" Harry screamed, shoving the man's hand off his back, "tell me the fucking truth!"

"Yes, Harry, " Snape hissed, putting his hand back on Harry's back, lightly pushing him onward, "Remus went to the cemetery. He was going to wake you up, but he was already running late."

"And I'm a burden on everyone." Harry said with a sigh, "I hate being screwed like this."

"You aren't a burden." Snape told him assuringly, "if you were, I don't think I'd be trying to help you up the stairs."

"You're only helping me up the stairs because Draco's not here." Harry retorted, taking another step, "didn't he have a meeting with the auror's?"

"That's what I heard." Snape replied as they neared the top, "and tomorrow he's taking you to get your eyes checked again. He thinks that the last guy you went to was a total nut."

"He only says that because the doctor said there was no hope for me. Draco thinks if some other doctor sees for himself, then he'll say I'll be okay." Harry sighed and bit his lip, shaking his head, "I won't be better, no matter who I go to."

Snape remained silent, and the only way Harry knew he was still there was because he never removed his hand from his back. He knew where he was going once he got to the top of the stairs. Four steps from the staircase, turn right, fifteen steps forward, turn left, and enter the room. It was simple, and yet Harry hated it more and more as each day passed. He hoped the new doctor would give him some hope, but that was probably never going to happen.

"Can you remind me again, Severus, why I have to go upstairs to do this? Why can't you do this in the study downstairs?" Harry asked, sarcasm dripping from his voice as he sat down at a table.

"Because you need the exercise." Snape replied automatically - it was always his answer. He sat down next to Harry, just to the right of him, and opened a book, "we stopped on N, correct?"

"I don't know. I don't pay attention anymore." Harry said, annoyed, "we do this everyday. I'm the fucking Boy Who Lived, and I have to do this!" He threw his hand out, knocking the book onto the floor, "I defeated Voldemort for fuck's sake! Why is it that no matter what I try to do, I manage to screw my life over anyway? I try to be careful, and something wrong **always** happens."

Snape dropped the book on the table, growing frustrated, "can we go one day, Mr. Potter, without you throwing a pity party like this? Just one day."

"I can't do anything except think about the last thing I saw, Severus!" Harry snapped, standing up so quickly it sent the chair crashing to the ground, "am I supposed to just..forget about it?! Forget about what I saw that day? Forget about what you, Sirius, Remus, Draco - all of them - look like?! I'm at the point where I can't even remember what _I_ look like!"

"I'm sorry about what you went through, Harry! I went through it too!" Snape argued from his spot in his chair, "I watched my best friend get slaughtered before the explosion. The past year hasn't been too great for me, either."

"Shut up, Severus. You have gone through nothing compared to me. I'm sick of living here. I'm sick of every God forsaken day, doing the same damn thing. Wake up, having Draco help me bathe -"

"-and he loves you anyway so he doesn't mind!" Snape said calmly, but Harry paid no attention.

"-then waiting for you to get up so we can all eat breakfast. Remus helps me up here where I spend countless hours learning how to use brail, something I doubt I'll ever need _anyway_, considering I'm the -"

"-fucking Boy Who Lived, yes yes Harry, I know." Snape finished, fixing the chair upright, "now, are you going to sit down so that we can start, and hopefully go to Hogsmeade later?"

"What's the point?" Harry held his walking stick in front of his body as he started to leave the room.

"Harry, can I ask you something?" Snape asked, and Harry turned around.

"Go ahead."

Snape thought about the question before asking, "what do you want more than _anything_?"

Harry scoffed, turned around and said, "I just want to see again. You know that. I'm going back to my room."

He carefully left the room, going back to the staircase, grasping the rail, and slowly going down each step, taking his time. The whole time he grumbled, "good for nothing Snape. Always thought he was better than me."

Once he was at the foot of the stairs, he walked in the direction of his bedroom. It was he and Draco's(A/N: that's right? the grammar?) House colors, though he'd never seen it. Draco and his mother had decorated it, and since they had always been Slytherin's, it was only appropriate to make the bedroom look like their own. Harry wasn't always a Slytherin himself, but that wasn't his decision.

"Draco.." Harry sighed, collapsing on the bed, dropping his walking stick next to the bed. He buried his head into the silk covered pillows, the cool silk rubbing against his bare legs and torso, calming him.

Thoughts crept into his mind as he closed his eyes. Knowing he shouldn't sleep so early in the afternoon, he fought to stay awake, but the darkness was suffocating. In moments, he was asleep, sprawled out on his bed.

-----*-----

_"Harry, where the hell are you going?" Ron spat, looking around quickly, "there are Death Eaters everywhere! Stay close to me and Malfoy! Remember the plan?"_

"But I heard Sirius." Harry continued to walk further from Ron and Draco, who were turning in mad circles, their wands held in front of their bodies, trying to find any Death Eaters, "I have to save him."

"Harry, it's not worth it!" Ron cried, rushing up to his best friend, "We need you to save your own ass so you can kill Him!"

"Get off me, Weasley." Harry sneered, pulling his arm from Ron's, "I will kill Voldemort when the time comes. This isn't the time, because he isn't here. I'm going to find Sirius. Remus and Severus are with him, right?"

"That was the plan, but Harry -"

"Draco, fucking stop!" Harry hissed and turned around, his Slytherin scarf nearly falling from his shoulders, "plan's change, okay? I need to save my Godfather, and whoever is over there with him. I'll be okay. You and Ron go to the castle and wait with Dumbledore, Hermione and the baby."

"But Harry!" Draco whined, and Harry shoved him in the direction of Hogwarts.

"Don't whine! I hate that. Besides, we're almost twenty. I'm an adult, as you are. Just go_!" Harry pushed the two again before hurrying off in the direction where he last heard Sirius's screams._

"I LOVE YOU!" Draco yelled beyond the trees, but Harry said nothing, continuing deep into the forest. He could hear Sirius now - he was whimpering.

At a quicker pace, Harry looked around frantically. He could vaguely make out screams from the Quidditch Pitch, but he blocked them out, trying to find Sirius's animagi form's whimpers.

"Harry!" Snape sneered, causing Harry to jump and pivot around, facing his professor, "what the hell are you doing here? You're supposed to be back at the castle with Albus!"

"Where's Sirius?" Harry asked, ignoring Snape's angry glare. The glare dropped from his face immediately, replaced with a sullen look, "Severus, where the hell is he?"

Snape moved to the side, revealing Sirius's body. It had been broken in so many places..

"No." Harry moaned, covering his head with his hands, "who killed him? Who did this?"

"Lucius." Snape replied, pushing Harry in the direction of the castle, "get to Albus. We've no time to waste. Remus is staying with me to fight off any new Death Eaters. Just run, and don't look back or stop. Go straight to the castle, tell Albus that Sirius has been killed. Get back to the Slytherin dormitories, Harry, and I mean it. Voldemort can't get in, and he's not supposed to show until the last battle. There are two more before now."

"But, Sirius.." Harry whimpered, reaching out to touch his Godfather's body, but Snape pushed him back roughly.

"I SAID GO, POTTER!" Snape yelled, and Harry turned around and ran as far away as he could, obeying Snape's orders. Through the forest, over fallen trees and bodies. He barely noticed little Ginny Weasley beside her brother, Charlie. Goyle and Crabbe were tossed over an overhanging branch, among others. Behind him, he could hear auror's yelling at the top of their lungs at Death Eaters. He could faintly see the green lights flashing around him from wands.

He was nearing the castle. Only a half a mile. He could see it clearly. Auror's guarded the front - no Death Eaters were seen. You could hear them in the Quidditch Pitch, shrieking madly. Harry ignored it, and continued to run. He ran up the steps, the auror's parting, letting their only chance at living into the castle. He fell onto the floor of the Entrance Hall, and his body started to rack with sobs.

"Harry?" Dumbledore hurried up to him, kneeling next to him, "what is it?"

"Ginny and Charlie Weasley are dead." Harry whispered, "Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle. Sirius was murdered."

Dumbledore looked up at McGonagall, grief taking over both of their features.

"Severus and Remus are still out there, fighting off Death Eaters." Harry gasped for breath, his chest tightening, and he fell into more sobs, "I can't fight of Voldemort. I can't.."

"Draco, bring Harry up to the dormitory." Dumbledore instructed, and Draco nodded, helping Harry up to a standing position. They walked slowly, just so Harry could catch his breath.

Hermione, holding her son, rushed to Harry, "are you okay? Oh, God Harry, what's happened?"

"Sirius has been killed. We have no hope after next battle. Sirius is gone." Harry whispered, shuddering at the thought, "only four battles instead of five. After this one, we've got one more until I face Voldemort. I can't face him. The next battle will go so quickly. Everyone's dying."

"It's okay." Hermione handed her son to Ron, who went off to entertain the 18 month old, "Harry, you need all the strength you can get. Forget about Sirius until it's all over. Please."

"Forget about Sirius?" Harry asked faintly, "I can't. It was so bad. Oh, God, his body was all twisted, and.." he broke down into more sobs. Draco gave Hermione a glare, and she took the hint, walking back over to stand with Ron.

"Harry, " Draco said softly, tightening his hold around Harry's waist, "it'll all be okay. You've been awake this whole week. All you need is sleep for the rest of tonight, and tomorrow."

"Your father killed Sirius." Harry whimpered, "Lucius killed my Godfather. I will kill Lucius."

"As will I, Harry, but you need sleep." Draco hugged Harry tightly before mumbling the password to the stone wall. The common room was revealed in moments, and the two walked into their House. Harry strayed away from Draco and fell into the couch near the fire, burying his head into the pillows, muffling his screams of anger and grief.

****__

The final battle. Harry stared at himself in the mirror, Draco behind him with his arms around his waist.

"It'll be okay." Draco assured him, "I'll be there with you. We all will be."

Harry shook his head, "not Sirius."

"Yes he will." Draco gave a small smile, "he'll be right here." He put his hand lightly over Harry's heart, "just remember that, okay? Lord Voldemort should be arriving soon on the Pitch, and everyone should be lining up to duel."

"Why is it that this was organized as a fucking game?" Harry asked, sighing.

"Because that's all this is to him." Draco answered, letting go of Harry, "are Hermione and Ron going to fight?"

"Ron is." Harry said numbly, "Hermione shouldn't. She has to watch their son."

Draco smiled at Harry and pulled him into a hug, giving him small, short kisses, "it will all be okay. I promise."

****__

Harry watched, his eyes wide, as Ron and Hermione charged three Death Eaters. They stood no chance against them. Within moments, they were murdered. Not by the Killing Curse. No; the Death Eater took pride in torturing them, ripping them apart.

"FUCK YOU!" Harry screamed at Voldemort, who stood behind him, laughing hysterically at the top of his lungs.

Behind him, Dumbledore lay, dead, slaughtered by Voldemort's hand. Snape was at Dumbledore's side, refusing to cry. He nodded at Harry as if to confirm something. Harry nodded back, and looked at Draco, who was standing beside his father's still body. He nodded at Harry, wiping blood from a gash below his eye.

"You think your friends will help you now?" Voldemort asked, narrowing his eyes, "what are you? Slytherin or Gryffindor, boy? You're more foolish than brave."

Harry screamed in anger as Snape and Draco covered their heads, lying flat on the ground besides the bodies of Death Eaters and aurors. Voldemort hissed in return, and opened his mouth to say the famous curse, when Harry pointed his wand at the ground, beside Voldemort's feet.

"What are you doing?" Voldemort's smirk twisted and started to fall, "giving up already? Well, it'll make everything easier for me.."

"EVERSIO_!" Harry screamed, and Voldemort's eyes widened as the ground beneath him, where Harry's wand was pointed, exploded. Harry let out a strangled cry as the colors and debris hit him._

-----*-----

Harry startled awake, and moved around on the bed, trying to get back to sleep.

"Oh, sorry, didn't mean to wake you."

"You didn't." Harry smiled a little, "what time is it?"

"Uh, " Draco paused, and Harry knew he was checking his watch, "noon. Just got back from the auror's meeting. Sev told me about what happened earlier, " Draco lied down on the bed next to Harry, putting his arm around his waist, "he was only trying to help you. But that'll change tomorrow when we go to the doctor."

"Draco, you know nothing will have changed!" Harry said with a sigh, "I'll always be fucked up."

"We're wizards for God's sake, Harry!" Draco hissed, "we can fix _everything_!"

Harry went silent, shaking his head, "not everything. We can't bring Sirius, Ron or Hermione back. Not Dumbledore."

Draco nuzzled Harry's neck before standing up again, "get up. Severus went to Hogsmeade to meet with Hagrid for the monthly party. I don't want to be home when they both come in, staggering drunk. Fred and George took the day off to take Caelum to Ron and Hermione's grave. Remus went with them, but intended to stay longer. He'll probably meet up with Severus and Hagrid later on. I want to take you to Diagon Alley."

"Why wouldn't anyone wake me up to go to the cemetery?" Harry pouted, "it must be getting near the anniversary."

"It is." Draco sighed, "but I was going to take you to the cemetery on the anniversary. Remus said it'd be too hard for him to go when a lot of other people will be there. Fred and George could only get today off."

Harry sat up and grabbed his walking stick that was leaning in it's spot against the wall. He stood up, and felt Draco's hands on his arm and back protectively.

"I can do it, get off." Harry snapped, throwing Draco's hands away, "I'm not completely handicapped yet."

"Christ, my trunk was there. I didn't want you to run into it." Draco sneered back, "I'm trying to help you, and all you do is bite my fucking head off."

"Look, Draco, if you want to help me, don't try to make things easier. I have to learn how to do this stuff on my own without help from anyone. If I fall and get hurt, then you can wave your wand and make it better." Harry found his way to the closet, and put his hand out, touching the separators, feeling the bumps, "this is green, right?"

"I thought you didn't need my help."

Harry scowled, "well, if it's purple, won't you be embarrassed to be seen with me?"

"You don't _own_ purple robes." Draco chuckled, "yes, it's green. The third one is the one with the silver lining."

When Harry was done getting dressed, Draco tried his best to comb his hair and make it look decent, then they set off.

-----*-----

Harry didn't attend the funeral, a year ago, of his Godfather, best friends, teachers, classmates and aurors. He was in the hospital, and was far too injured to go. He visited the cemetery once he was out of the hospital, and it was hard enough then.

"_Sirius Black_." Draco whispered, holding Harry's hand for reassurance, "_Head of the Order, Master of Operations, the father one has never had_." He placed a white rose on the gravestone.

"I miss him so much." Harry choked back tears, turning and burying his head into Draco's neck, hugging him tightly, "I know why he was killed, but..but.." he choked more, and Draco held him for a minute while Harry got composure again, "okay."

"_Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger-Weasley_." Draco read softly, "_died protecting their world, their friends, their son_."

Draco placed two roses ontop of the graves, closing his eyes and whispering a small prayer. Harry shuddered, trying to hold back sobs, as they continued on.

"_Albus Dumbledore_."

"I want to go, Draco. I can't handle this." Harry whimpered, and Draco placed another rose on the gravestone.

He held three others: Minerva McGonagall, Charlie Weasley, and Ginny Weasley.

"It's okay. Let's go home." Draco whispered, putting his arm around Harry's shoulders and guiding him out of the cemetery, never looking back.

----------------------

I don't like the ending very much. *coughs* I suck at endings. So, anyway..

Caelum is Ron/Hermione's son. Uhh..I guess Harry went to the doctor and they said they couldn't do anything about it. Hm. If I left anything else out..*shrugs* oh well.

Love you guys!


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